Gotta Love Jerry Seinfeld

I found a page of quotes from Jerry Seinfeld while I was surfing the web today........Who doesn't love Jerry Seinfeld?!?!?!?


~Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

~Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge.

~The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a war. Pretty impressive. Also pretty lucky for them. Ever see that little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with? Not much of a weapon there. Corkscrews. Bottle openers. "Come on, buddy, let's go. You get past me, the guy in back of me, he's got a spoon. Back off. I've got the toe clippers right here."

~Why do people give each other flowers? To celebrate various important occasions, they're killing living creatures? Why restrict it to plants? "Sweetheart, let's make up. Have this deceased squirrel."

~Why do they call it a "building"? It looks like they're finished. Why isn't it a "built"?

~I have a friend who’s collecting unemployment insurance. This guy has never worked so hard in his life as he has to keep this thing going. He’s down there every week, waiting on the lines and getting interviewed and making up all these lies about looking for jobs. If they had any idea of the effort and energy that he is expending to avoid work, I’m sure they’d give him a raise.

~My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty, and that's the law.

~See, the thing of it is, there's a lot of ugly people out there walking around but they don't know they're ugly because nobody actually tells them.

~You can measure distance by time. "How far away is it?" "Oh about 20 minutes." But it doesn't work the other way. "When do you get off work?" "Around 3 miles."

~Are there keys to a plane? Maybe that's what those delays are sometimes, when you're just sitting there at the gate. Maybe the pilot sits up there in the cockpit going, "Oh, I don't believe this. Dammit..I did it again." They tell you it's something mechanical because they don't want to come on the P.A. system, "Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to be delayed here on the ground for a while. I uh..Oh, God this is so embarrassing...I, I left the keys to the plane in my apartment. They're in this big ashtray by the front door. I'm sorry, I'll run back and get them."

New Drugs for Women

DAMNITOL
Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.

EMPTYNESTROGEN
Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you ofhow awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till theymoved out.

ST. MOMMA'S WORT
Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolersunconscious for up to two days.

PEPTOBIMBO
Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before anevening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and preventsconception.

DUMBEROL
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting inenjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.

FLIPITOR
Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and theurge to flip off other drivers.

MENICILLIN
Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethallines as, "You make me want to be a better person. "

BUYAGRA
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency,duration, and credit limit of spending spree.

JACKASSPIRIN
Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday,anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.

ANTI-TALKSIDENT
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager toshare their life stories with total strangers in elevators.

NAGAMENT
When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritationlevel as nagging him.

Bragging rights......

Just wanted to share a little of the amazing technology that my Cat Scan machine is capable of. Although I cannot disclose any information regarding patient information I would like to state that I DO in fact have permission from this patient to share her images. She was more than happy to let us use them as a learning tool or to display them to let people know the capbilities of our machine.

These images are from a scan I did yesterday. This test is called a Computerized tomography venography scan of the left upper extremity: CTV LUE, for short. Basically what that means is we used the Cat Scan machine to take pictures of someone's veins in their arm with x-ray dye in it. It amazes me how quickly the technology changes in my field. When I started this job 11 years ago, this wasn't even taught on a regular basis. The machines were not capable of scanning quickly enough to catch the dye rush through their veins. In stead, we would inject dye and shoot regular x-rays which are much less helpfull in diagnosing a clot or abnormality in the vein. Just thought these were really cool images, and the radiologist even made an image just for "the deadhead," that would be me :-)


In one image (the side view), you can see this patient has a port a cath. I know Jen is familiar with these. It is a little piece of plastic that is under the skin on the patient's chest. It has a catheter attached to the patients blood vessels so that the vessels can be accessed without having to start an IV on the patient. Port a caths are very common in cancer patients and patients with difficult veins to stick. You can see the port just below the skin...it is the small golden colored half moon shaped object that shows a syringe outside the skin in front of it.

This is the image made specifically for "the deadhead." The radiologist who read the exam thought I needed one with a phychedlic touch :-)

Gas Nazis

Thinking of those at VA Tech

Wow, things like this really put life into perspective don't they?

It was just yesterday, as these awful events were unfolding, that I sat safely at a computer at work blogging about my stolen camera. It seems very petty and minuscule now compared to the tragic events at VA Tech yesterday.

These things always have a way of making people step back for a minute and ask questions about our world today. It is such a scary place in so many ways. Even in a place such as your college dorm, where you feel that you're surrounded by friends and in a somewhat safe environment, it can be very scary.

I feel terrible for the families of all the victims, for the remaining students who must walk those hallways where their friends lost their lives, and also for the family of the shooter.

I read an article that I found a few quotes from students while they were in prayer. I can only imagine the horror in their hearts and their heads as they spoke these words:

"For Ryan and Emily," a young woman said, "and for those whose names we do not know."

"For Heidi, and her doctors and nurses and friends and families," added another.

"For all the children in our community who are afraid," said a third woman.

Then a man: "Lord, I pray for the family of the gunman, who will forever be searching for answers I know they'll never find."

For a great report of Mondays events, see this article:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070417/ap_on_re_us/virginia_tech_day_of_hell_2

Uncle Buck's Sucks!!!

I'm going to start this post with a disclaimer stating that the language used here may not be fit for Sissy's ears.....and an apology to the family for me talking like a sailor...but by the time you read this...you may have a few choice words to throw out there too.....................

Ryan and I went on our first camping trip of the year this past weekend. After it was all said and done, we decided we will just refer to this little trip as "Mud Fest" from now on.

Apparently, It was a little colder up here than it was Down in New Marshfield Ohio....at least we didn't get any snow, but it rained like hell the whole time we were there.....thank God for who ever invented those cheap little yellow rain coats :-)

It was a very interesting weekend to say the least. A lot of fun in a lot of ways, but also very disappointing in other ways.

We took off from West Middleton at about 5:30 Saturday morning with a five hour drive ahead of us. I woke up excited and raring to go as I always do before a Hookah show. The drive there was gloomy, but it was still nice to be awake and headed towards my Hookah boys again. I swear, they are like heroin to me......if I don't get a fix at least once a month, I start going through withdraw and freaking out....so I was ready for my next fix:-)

When we got to Uncle Buck's where the show was held, it was pretty laid back. I started seeing familiar faces right away, and hunted down a few friends I knew would be there. After we got the tent all set up, I took a quick nap while Ryan and my friend Julie took off to walk around and check everything out. When I woke up, they were still gone, so I made a quick trip to the port-o-potty, and went back to the tent to change clothes. I knew if I went towards the music, we would all find eachother eventually.

There was music starting at noon, so I headed down to "the barn" where the concerts were held, and enjoyed some alone time. The opening bands were all fantastic. I stuck around by the front of the stage for about a half an hour before Ryan finally found me. We danced for awhile and decided we needed to make one more trip to the tent to eat before the big show (Ekoostik Hookah) started.

When we got back to the tent, we realized that we weren't dealing with the normal Hookah crowd...our tent had been broken into. No....we didn't have a lock on it....shame on us. But, we have NEVER had the need to lock our tent up before. This was a very small festival, so we felt like we were with our extended family. We thought wrong.

Here's the worst of it. The Bastards stole my digital camera!!!!!! Can you believe that?!?!? ASSHOLES!!!!!! (sorry sissy....I can't help it) I was so pissed off, I could hardly think straight. Julie and Kelly Jo didn't have much in the tent besides clothes, so they were pretty safe. Now that I've been home for a day, I have heard from several different people who were at the show and had the same problem.

I am on a message board called Hookahheads.com and all the messages about Uncle Buck's this weekend have something to do with all the shady people who were prowling around. It's really a shame. I have always prided myself on the crowd that Hookah brings to their shows. Like I said, I consider most of those people my extended family. They are mostly awesome people who would do anything for one another.

I think a big majority of the problem was the fact that the festival was so cheap. it was only twenty bucks to get in, and that included all the shows AND camping for the night. That price is unheard of. I'm pretty sure some shady characters took advantage of that cheap show knowing they could get in and get their money's worth in stolen merchandise very quickly.

Needless to say, Ekoostik Hookah has already re-sceduled their next show they had planned there. It only took them one day to change it and make arrangements for another venue. The guys from the band were really pissed off, and hurt for those of us who got robbed. There was enough trouble that they had already started changing things for their summer tour before the even started playing Saturday night. I really appreciate the way the band looks out for their fans. In fact, I think I got my "Party Girl" because I whined enough to Eric. I told him it was the only thing that would make the trip worthwhile........that was a big fat lie, and I think he knew it, but hey, it worked.....we got our Party Girl!!! Thanks Eric if you had anything to do with that :-)

My friend Kelly Jo was just getting home to Grand Rapids Michigan today because some asshole stole Travis' keys among some other things. Travis was her ride home. They were still waiting on a locksmith to come to them at Uncle Buck's last night at 8:00 PM. They finally got there, and made a key for Travis, but he was only taking Kelly Jo as far as Chicago where she was riding a train the rest of the way to Grand Rapids. Obviously, she missed her first train.....but managed to get her ticket transferred considering the situation. It's 10:50 now, and she' probably just getting home......she should have been there 24 hours ago.

OK, besides all the bullshit of getting our stuff stolen, the show was awesome!!! I tried my hardest to put what I couldn't control behind me and just enjoy myself. I think I did a pretty good job. Oh yeah, and that bottle of wine I downed shortly after the break-in helped a lot too :-) I figured what the hell....I might as well get trashed...I'm cold, I'm wet, I've been robbed....I might as well get drunk. That's not my usual answer to anything......I'm always the designated driver, but I felt like I deserved to not be responsible for once....and you know what? It felt really good.....

I got a little loopy, but I remeber the whole night, so I'm doing better than some people I know :-)

I borrowed just a few pictures from a friend of mine who was smart, unlike myself, and had her camera on her the whole night. She let me take a piture of Eric, and promised to send it. He was posing for me. I felt so special :-) Hopefully I'll get some pics that have us in them. Until then, I'll give ya what I've got.

She also got several pictures of Eric (My favorite drummer in the whole wide world) So, I'm very happy to have a friend willing to share those :-) I got another drum stick from him.....I've got quite a collection going now :-) In one of the pictures, you can see the drumstick I got...it's all frayed in the middle....just about to break in half. He only gives me the sticks he breaks. But I think he gets so crazy on that drumset that he breaks at least one almost every show.

We got to hear "Party Girl" and that always makes me happy :-) Cause I'm the freakin' PARTY GIRL!!!!!! That was the last song of the last set....great way to close the show. Of course, just because it was the last song of the last set, that doesn't mean that it was the last song of the night. They actually closed with their song called "Somewhere Down The Line." I always love to hear that song live. Cliffy usually yodels through part of it. I know you're all probably thinking, what the hell? Yodeling??? Yes, yodeling. I know it sounds weird, but if you know Ekoostik Hookah, nothing will ever shock you in the musical sense. It's also a great song for the end of the show, because it reassures us all that we'll be seein' eachother again sometime soon. Us Hookah fans live for knowing we will be doing it all over again soon.........Only about a month until Hookahville!!!!!!!

Here's the picture I took....How can you not just LOVE that sweet face?!?!?

There's my drumstick.......see how it's all frayed in the middle? That's only first set...it got worse as the songs kept coming....when they look like that, they go home with me :-)

There's a couple great shots of Cliffy...none while he was yodeling, but I really like the way the lighting was caught next to him.

Has this ever happened to you?

Ryan and I were driving down the highway last night, and we got behind a semi. I know truck drivers get frustrated with us average joes out on the road with them sometimes, and I don't blalme them. I'm the first to admit that I have a little problem with road rage. But, this guy must have been really ticked!!!

We were in Ryan's truck, and his headlights are bright enough that sometimes people will flash us thinking we have our brights on. That gets frustrating sometimes, but I understand, because it's hard to see with someone's brights glaring in your eyes. Anyway, we were coming up pretty close to the back end of this truck, and all of a sudden, we get this huge bright beam of light blinding us from the front, driver's side of the truck. It looked like he had a spotlight on the side of the truck or something.

We got into the left lane to pass him, and realized that he was shining some kind of light at us. We thought he probably thought we had our brights on, so we flashed them real quick just to let him know they were in fact the low beams, and we weren't trying to be rude or obscure his vision.

Instead of turning his light off, he kicked it up a notch, and nearly blinded us for life. It was so bad that we had to speed up and get around him just so we could see again. When we got up close to the cab of the truck, I realized he had a super duper beam flashlight, and he was shining it through his rear view mirror right into our faces. I was pissed because he kept moving it to stay right in my eyes as we went around him. I was in the passengers seat, looking him right in the face, and he shined it right back in my face. What an a**hole!!!!

I wanted to scream a few obsenities out the window at him, but Ryan wouldn't let me. That was probably a good decision on Ryan's part. I have been known to get into some heated road rage rounds with people before. You know, it starts out with a little flashing of the lights and ends up with us screaming out the windows at eachother, and racing down the road just to prove a point that will mean absolutely nothing when you part ways. But, as long as I'm sharing the same strip of road with someone, I expect a little respect, and I'm more than willing to give it right back.

A**hole truck-driver!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anybody need a beagle?

Meet Mickey...the latest addition to our family, for now anyway :-)

Ryan and I have our 5th foster dog and are on the hunt for a good home for him. He loves kids and is very well behaved. If anyone knows somebody who's looking for a new pet, he's available!!!! His adoption fee is a little less than most of our animals because he hasn't had to go through a bunch of vet trips since we got him. He's a very healthy boy.

Oh yeah....he likes to pose for the camera too :-)

If you or anyone you know is interested, or if you just feel like you want to help...there are lots of ways. Check out Mickey's link on petfinder... http://search.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=8155118

Clothespin Discipline

Apparently there's a substitute teacher out there somewhere who likes clothes pins.

Did anyone hear about the sub in Ohio that is being disciplined for putting clothes pins on the lips of some of her kindergarten students for talking too much? Can you believe she would even consider this? Don't get me wrong, I think teachers should have more rights to discipline children than they do, but that is a little out of line in my opinion.

This woman is a retired school nurse. Back when she was working as a nurse full time, maybe there was more leway in discipline in the school system. I'm not sure. But, whatever her thinking was, I think it was wrong for her to do that.

The article I read about it said that the children were not hurt during the incident, but the school district will not allow her to work for them anymore. She is being reported to the Ohio state department of education. Surely they will not allow her to teach again.

I know that kids can be hard to handle sometimes. I also realize that it has to be really hard for teachers because they are so limited in what they can do to get kids to act better. But, I would be irate if my child came home telling me his teacher did this to him.

It makes me wonder if she has used these tactics before, and this just happens to be the first time it was ever brought to someone's attention. Kind of scary to think about kids in strangers' hands.

Birthday wishes!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BOOGIE, AND HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO OLIVE_12 !!!!

OLIVE_12 IS 15 YEARS OLD NOW!!! HOLY COW!! THAT REALLY MAKES ME FEEL OLD.

ESPECIALLY SINCE SHE SAID SHE FEELS OLD!! WAY TO MAKE US OLD FOLKS FEEL BETTER ABOUT OURSELVES :-)



AND BOOGIE HIT THE BIG 3 TODAY....HARD TO BELIEVE!!! BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, HE'LL BE GRADUATING FROM COLLEGE!!!

One of Those Days

Well, it has been one of those days with my mom today......Dang it.....She does so good for so long, and then CRASH...she goes tumbling down.

It's so frustrating sometimes to see her one day and she's doing fine. She's thinking clearly. She's happy and content with her life. She is able to be social. Then, two days later, I stop over only to be greeted with her wild eyes at the front door. I can always tell as soon as I see her what kind of day it's going to be.

I took her out to my house for awhile because she wanted to call her Dad. I was hesitant at first, because I knew that she wouldn't make any sense talking to him. Sometimes I just let her do what ever she wants when she's like that because it's easier than trying to reason with her.

Will gave me ten dollars when we left and begged me to get Mom to eat something. He said she hasn't eaten for two days. She wouldn't get any food from a restaurant today because she said it was "tainted." So, luckily, I talked her into eating some leftover chili I had at home. Will was so sweet about trying to get her to eat. Sometimes, I don't know how he lives with her.

She didn't have any major break downs or anything while I was with her, but she said several weird things. The food thing was kind of weird, and when I left, she hit me on the head and called me a "knuckle-head." I actually kind of laughed about that. She also kept asking me if the radio was "indefinite." It took me a minute to figure out that she wanted me to turn it down. She also wanted to "go out on the wheels" when she was ready to leave my house.

I'm sure that this has all been caused by her not taking her meds. The case manager left her meds for a few days trusting her to take them herself. Apparently they are short staffed this week because of spring break, and don't have enough people to stop by everyone's house every day to give them their meds. This happens every time they leave meds for her. I called the hospital today and talked to a nurse who will be stopping by there tonight. I warned her that Mom might get violent. She usually does when someone comes over to try to get her meds in her. The best way to go is to give her a shot. I don't even know for sure what they give her, but it knocks her out for at least a day, and makes her much easier to handle.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better..................................

Father Son Portrait

Ryan and I are babysitting our grand-dog this week while Mandy is in Vegas. Doesn't Jerry look handsome next to his oldest son? It is truly Weiner World at Alli-gal's this week :-)

(left-Samson 3 yrs, right-Jerry 8 yrs)
Samson is a little camera shy....he reminds me of his mommy, Maggie Mae. I think she would be proud :-)