Wednesday, December 17, 2008

In Response to Andrea's "Jesus Butter" Comment


In southern Ohio, just north of Cincinnati

I beheld a vision, next to the expressway.

Was a 60 foot jesus, with his hands in the air

looks like he’s carved out of butter,

just like at the state fair.





Big butter Jesus

Sweet cream Jesus

Oh country fresh Jesus

Unsalted Jesus

Oh Promise Jesus

Imperial Jesus

Can’t believe it’s not Jesus

Oleo Lord.





Well you see him from the chest up

like he’s about to do a back flip,

like he scored a touchdown

or maybe melting or about to drown.

Well I’ve been to the state fair

seen a cow made out of corn cobs

Garth Brooks made of string cheese

and the virgin out of olives.



Big butter Jesus

Sweet cream Jesus

Oh country fresh Jesus

Unsalted Jesus

Oh Promise Jesus

Imperial Jesus

Can’t believe it’s not Jesus

Oleo Lord.





Shipped in pieces on a flatbed

staring backwards was his big head

Driver stuck in traffic backups

desperately avoiding eye contact

Well don’t make no graven images.

That’s one of the 10 commandments

I hope the grading curve is kindly

You get to heaven with a 90



Big butter Jesus

Sweet cream Jesus

Oh country fresh Jesus

Unsalted Jesus

Oh Promise Jesus

Imperial Jesus

Can’t believe it’s not Jesus

Oleo Lord.



Can’t believe it’s not Jesus,

Oh spread the word.

4 comments:

Andrea said...

I completely forgot about Big Butter Jesus! I love that song too!

Bitzky77 said...

He is the alpha, and the oleo.

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